February 4, 2022

by Pastor Steve Pahl

Relationships are under greater strain right now than at any other moment in my lifetime.

Relationships have always been challenging. There is always a certain amount of stress in our friendships, our family relationships, and our work relationships. Yet these relationships have provided so many benefits for us as well. The best moments of our lives are more enjoyable because of the people we share them with. The worst moments of our lives often involve tensions with people. This is the normal struggle of relationships.

However, what we have experienced in Canada over the last two years has only taken this normal tension that we experience in our relationships and ramped it up tenfold.

The other day we celebrated one of our staff members 5th Anniversary of working at the church. I joked with him that every Covid year should count for 10 years of real time. We laughed. Others who heard it laughed. But then, as I walked out the door, the truth of that statement hit me. It’s not just Covid. I mean, it has only been two years, but… the amount of change we have been through in every phase of Covid has caused it to feel like ten years instead of two. It is almost as if – in some workplaces and some homes – the amount of relationship tension we have experienced in two years is what we normally would have experienced in ten years. Is that true for some of you? I know it has been true for us at the church. It has been true for some of our small groups. It has been true for some of our marriages. It has been true for some of our extended family relationships.

That funeral – where normally many people could come and share with you and comfort you and interact with you – was now a gathering of ten people. And in that funeral experience, you may not have felt the same comfort that you otherwise would have known.

That wedding – where normally you could celebrate with family and see extended family and share and deepen your bond with them – was now a small event which may have been great in some ways, but you missed out on extended bonding time with your family members.

Our workplaces – where normally we would have seasons of celebration and challenge and good days and hard days – have become places where every day is challenging in ways that are beyond what it used to be. Then, add in the conversation about vaccination and non-vaccination and vaccine mandates and masking and you have an increase of strain.

Our schools – where teaching is already a challenging profession and figuring out life as a kid already has its challenges – have become places where the strain on administrators and classroom instructors is beyond anything we could have imagined. Not to mention the unknowable effects on the future of this generation of kids.

Yes, there are pockets of people, and certain professions, that have remained relatively unaffected. But I think it is fair to say that if we add up all that we have lost in terms of positive relational connection, and then add to that all of the increased strain on relationships, that we are receiving less out of our relationships these days, and in an environment that is strained to the max.

The last four Sundays, I have endeavoured to preach a series on relationships. My goal was not to focus solely on Covid, but to remind us all about effective relationship principles that can help us – not only in Covid – but beyond it. I highly encourage you, if you have not heard the series, to take some time and listen to the four messages. I truly believe that God has a better future in store, and, in time, we are going to come out of this season, but at what cost to our relationships? What will this season have cost us in terms of friendships and family connections?

As the pandemic winds down over the coming months, let’s make a concerted effort to re-invest in our relationships. Let’s make a concerted effort to be merciful with each other. Let’s make a concerted effort to be firm with each other in a way that honors Jesus. And let’s pray for each other. Pray that God will make us aware of the areas within each of our hearts that He wants to change.

In His Grip, Pastor Steve Pahl

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